When starting any new relationship, it’s essential to watch for any toxic traits that might emerge. But it’s also vital to look for green flags – signs that will give you hints about your partner’s long-term compatibility with you.
Green flags are healthy behaviors that demonstrate someone’s character, values and overall outlook on life. If you see these 10 green flags, you can be more confident your fledgling relationship is heading in the right direction.
1. You Can Be Emotionally Vulnerable With Each Other
You and your partner should feel comfortable talking about your emotions – good and bad. Though it might be awkward, being honest will strengthen your relationship and deepen your connection. A willingness to display openness during difficult conversations is a hallmark of a healthy, stable relationship. The alternative to this is suppressing emotions and letting them fester, which could increase negativities like resentment.
2. They Are Willing to Apologize
The ability to admit when they are wrong and apologize is a green flag signifying someone’s emotional maturity. When a partner deflects blame, trivializes your concerns or refuses to take accountability, it suggests their ego takes precedence over other people’s feelings.
3. They Make You Feel Safe
Your partner should empower you to be your authentic self, without fear of ridicule or judgment. Someone who routinely demeans, belittles you or tries to tear you down is likely a toxic person who doesn’t have your best interests at heart.
4. They Are Empathetic and Use Active Listening Skills
Empathy is a crucial relationship green flag. Your partner should be in tune with your emotions, uplifting you when you are sad and celebrating with you when you’re excited. Also, notice how your partner reacts when you talk. Do they stop what they are doing to give you their undivided attention? Do they demonstrate they are listening by nodding, asking questions or maintaining eye contact? An empathetic partner with good listening skills will validate your feelings without challenging them.
5. They Respect Your Boundaries
Boundaries are integral to well-adjusted relationships. By creating boundaries, you let the other people in your life know what behaviors you will and won’t accept. Think of them like a force field around your mental health. Your partner and other loved ones should respect the lines you draw and honor your comfort zone.
6. You Can See a Future With Them
Someone who plans to stay with you for the long haul should be comfortable sharing their vision for the future. In contrast, a partner who is unwilling to discuss their long-range plans with you may be planning to end the relationship soon.
7. You Share Similar Values
When starting any relationship, similar priorities are a green flag. It’s OK if your values aren’t perfectly identical, but you should establish a few fundamental things you have in common. As you get to know each other, ask questions about their family and political worldview. Do they typically treat others with kindness, generosity and honesty, or do you notice any rudeness or impatience? Do their traits align with yours, or are there fundamental differences you can’t move past?
8. They Encourage You to Have Other Friends
If you get caught up in the excitement surrounding a new relationship, you may want to spend every minute together, but even people who are wildly in love shouldn’t be joined at the hip all the time. A respectful partner won’t act jealous or resentful when you need to be alone or visit with your friends and family members. Instead, they’ll support your hobbies and friendships.
9. They Are Reliable and Consistent
Of course, everyone occasionally has a bad day or feels irritable about something, but it’s a red flag when your partner is so volatile you feel like you are walking on eggshells around them. You shouldn’t need to worry that they’re going to lose their temper and lash out at you at the drop of a hat.
10. You Find Yourself Laughing and Smiling a Lot
In the early stages of a relationship, feeling good around each other is a green flag. If you have discovered a newfound joy in life and your friends notice you are more upbeat, it could be a sign your relationship is off to a good start.
A Positive Attitude Changes Everything
Since 2012, PACE Recovery has provided an immersive, evidence-based, supportive approach to treating mental and behavioral health issues in young adult men. We empower our clients to live fulfilling, sober lives with Orange County mental health care. To learn more about how we can help you overcome substance use and co-occurring disorders, connect with us today.
